Humanity is off balance. That’s the truth many don’t want to face. Conversations about the division between men and women often get heated, personal, or dismissed.
Recently, I found myself in one of those debates online. The post showed a picture of a woman carrying the weight of the world: paying bills, cooking, raising kids, working a 9–5 while her partner sat comfortably playing video games. The image was powerful, and it sparked a wave of comments about how women are doing everything alone while men get a free pass.
I spoke up to point out something important: imbalance exists, but it’s not one-sided.
My Point Was Balance
I wrote:
“Very respectfully, the truth is, things are tough for both men and women. There are plenty of households that look exactly like this on either side. The few are messing it up for the many, and it’s creating resentment where there should be partnership. Some people really need to take their bad experiences to therapy, instead of infesting the world with toxic nonsense. Social media isn’t love advice. It’s designed to divide us. Healthy relationships aren’t about who does more, they’re about balance, respect, and supporting each other. That’s the part nobody wants to admit.”
Some people agreed. Others didn’t. One person replied by shifting the conversation toward race and stereotypes, trying to put words in my mouth that I never said.
I responded:
“Respectfully, that’s not what I said at all. My point is about imbalance in relationships and households, not about blaming one group of people. Bringing up ‘serial baby daddies’ is shifting the conversation into something I never mentioned. I’m talking about balance and accountability across the board.”
This exchange revealed exactly what I was trying to show: the problem isn’t men vs. women. The problem is imbalance—and how quickly we turn these discussions into battles instead of opportunities for understanding.
What Imbalance Looks Like
The viral images tell both sides of the story:
For Women: They often carry the invisible weight of housework, childcare, and emotional labor, even when they also provide financially. They’re praised for “doing it all,” but rarely questioned on why they have to. For Men: They’re pressured to always provide, to never show weakness, and to carry strength even when they’re breaking inside. If they step into caregiving roles, they’re judged for not being “man enough.”
Both sides are carrying bags that are too heavy. The imbalance just looks different depending on the household.
Why This Matters
When imbalance is normalized, it breeds resentment instead of partnership. Social media thrives on this, it amplifies extreme stories, pits men and women against each other, and leaves little room for nuance.
But balance is possible. It starts with:
Acknowledgment: Admitting both men and women face struggles. Partnership: Dividing responsibilities based on fairness, not gender. Respect: Recognizing each other’s weight without minimizing it. Support: Carrying the load together, not competing over who does more.
The Bigger Picture
The problem isn’t men. The problem isn’t women. The problem is imbalance.
The images we share online shouldn’t be used to attack one gender while excusing the other. They should remind us that partnership requires balance. Healthy relationships aren’t competitions they’re about balance, respect, and supporting each other through the weight we all carry.
Call-to-Action
Where do you see imbalance in your own life? Do you feel unseen in the weight you carry, or do you notice the burdens your partner carries that go unspoken?
Let’s have that conversation. Not as men versus women, but as people working toward balance.
